Eli K.

Real Name: Eli James Keltner

Code Name: The Captain

Age: 64! but I wish I were 31 again. Yeah! It worked! Ahhhh!

Occupation: Teacher of children

Specialty: Able to transform into Jesus Lizard catching the attention of seafood restaurant patrons everywhere. Inventor of games such as Moose-gun-fire. Fluency in Japanese, Greedo and Jive.

Notes: Be aware that The Captain is frightfully sentimental and is prone to severe bouts of nostalgia. When cornered at a party he is likely to offer a toast to good friends and good times past and present. Please help him reach his goal of at least seven hugs a day.

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